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the
donald.

in rose garden

on the desk since 2026

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YMCA, incredible song, people love it, strong letters, Y, M, C, A, nobody does letters better, tremendous energy, frankly it might be about working out, it might be about something else, we’re looking into it.

Art of the Deal

Fantastic book, really a masterpiece, people say it’s the best deal book ever written, maybe any book, frankly, I’ve read it many times, tremendous insights, very strong, very smart, it teaches winning, and we love winning.

I’m holding this fork and it’s a toothpick, a total disaster, frankly it’s a very nasty fork. It’s tiny, it’s flimsy, it’s probably a deep-state fork designed to make my hands look like massive, powerful skyscrapers, which they are, they’re the biggest hands in history, but this fork is a loser, it’s a very sad, very weak situation.

Washington D.C.

I looked at the ballroom and I said, 'This gold is very tired, it’s very weak,' so we brought in the real stuff, the heavy shine, and now the failing New York Times is saying it’s too bright, but the people love it because they're coming in and saying, 'Sir, it’s so bright I can’t even see the fake news,' and it’s true, it’s a beautiful thing.

Some people are saying that I’m always playing 4D chess, but let me tell ya, the horsie, it’s a very confused animal, it moves in an 'L' shape because it doesn’t have the courage to go straight, a total loser, so I took the board and I painted it all gold, no more black squares, we’re getting rid of the black squares,

I watched the film and I said, 'Brett, it’s too short, we need more Melania,' so we added thirty minutes of her just looking at a marble wall, which is a very expensive wall, the best marble you’ve ever seen.

Happy Cinco de Mayo! The best taco bowls are made in Trump Tower Grill. I love Hispanics!

I’m looking at the CNN reporter, a very low-IQ individual with a very greasy forehead, and I said, 'Your camera is crying because it has to look at such a failing face,' and frankly, his teleprompter is written in crayon because he can’t handle the big words, and it’s a very sad, and very weak thing.

I go on the Truth and I see my posts, they're incredible, and I say, 'Who wrote this?' because the brilliance is very high, it's very huge, and I don't look at the other people because they're losers, they have no followers, and I’m just reading my own words and I’m saying, 'Wow, I’m even smarter than I thought,' and it’s a beautiful thing.

I look at the Diet Coke and I say, 'You’re the only one who’s not fake,' because it’s got that beautiful bubbles, the best bubbles, and I drink it all day and I never get tired of it because it’s a very loyal beverage, not like the failing Pepsi which is a total disaster with weak bubbles.

I’ve never been in a kitchen because the ovens are very hot, they’re very aggressive, and frankly, why would I go in there when the food just appears on a silver tray, the biggest tray you’ve ever seen, brought by people who say, 'Sir, you’re too handsome to touch a spatula,

Florsheim shoes - Lexington model

I looked at Marco and I said, 'Marco, your shoes are very small, they're like doll shoes,' so I gave him the Florsheims, the big man shoes, and now he’s walking around the State Department actually making a sound when he hits the floor, and frankly, he’s two inches taller and much less thirsty.

I look at these police officers, big, strong, incredible-looking guys, and I say, 'It’s like central casting,' because they have the best chins you’ve ever seen, very masculine, very powerful, and they’re standing there in their uniforms looking like 10 out of 10s, much better than the actors in Hollywood who are very weak and very small.

I look at the truth and I say, 'It’s too small, it’s a very tiny reality,' so I’m avoiding the boring facts because I have my own facts, the biggest, most golden facts you’ve ever seen.